[MARVIN]
I love being Marvin
I love being Marvin
Marvin always eats
The finest breakfast in town

[THE LADIES]
How Marvin eats his breakfast

[MARVIN]
Everybody into the kitchen
Here comes Marvin
Banging his groin with his fist

[LADIES]
He mumbles in, to insist:

[MARVIN]
No one looks busy in this kitchen
And my breakfast isn't ready
And my stomach aches
I mean specifically the maid
Who is reclining like she's laid the golden egg

I want some chatter and some gruel
Make me wanna drool
Try to make me hungry
Cat got your tongue?

[LADIES]
Marvin always knows the sort of answers he'll allow

[MARVIN]
I may be sly, dear, but not young

[LADIES]
"Wait until I'm older, then I'll kill you" is his one unspoken vow

[MARVIN]
I need my breakfast now

[ALL]
Everybody into the kitchen
Here comes Marvin

[LADIES]
Aiming a gun at the maid;
He shoots her head; she falls dead

[MARVIN]
O Jesus Christ, it wasn't loaded
She's an actor from the old school
And a lousy chef
I don't want miracles from heaven
Just some eggies over spinach over toast
No, I will not apologize!
She should win a prize:
"Very best emoting"

[LADIES]
Oooooo...

[MARVIN]
That girl can't cook

[LADIES]
Maybe she can't cook, but have you seen her milk a cow?

[MARVIN]
And I can read her like a book

[LADIES]
Marvin wouldn't read that kind of novel anyhow

[MARVIN]
I need my breakfast
Now

[MARVIN]                                  [LADIES]
People, people                            ...people, people
Stop your staring                         ...stop your staring
People, people, stop your staring
Get to work my breakfast isn't made yet   People, people, stop your staring
                                          Get to work my breakfast isn't-

[ALL]
Life is lonely
Life is rotten

[MARVIN]
And thankfully short
Thankfully short
Thankfully short

[LADIES]
Like Marvin

[ALL]
Everybody into the kitchen
Here comes

[MARVIN]
M-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m...

[ALL]
Marvin

[LADIES]
Waving his hands like a twit
He throws a fit
Then a knife

[MARVIN]
You call this breakfast on my birthday?
This is shit
This isn't breakfast
I could crack your feet

I mean for God's sake
Am I talking to the wall?
When I say breakfast
I mean food

I dreamt all night of hips and legs
Now I want some eggs:
Things I might relate to

[LADIES]
Oooooo...

[MARVIN]
I'm just a sprite

[LADIES]
Marvin underestimates the fear that he'll endow

[MARVIN]
I'll wait here till you get it right!

[LADIES]
Do I? Do I really?
Do I really have to show you people-

[LADIES]    [MARVIN]
-How?        I-

[ALL]
Need my breakfast
Now!